Sunflowers

Summer 2021

I don’t remember when I decided sunflowers were my favorite flower. 

Was it before or after I started working part-time in a flower shop? (I started working there during my last semester of high school and continued working there during the years I spent at community college before transferring to a four-year university.)

I do know that a year after I graduated high school, my mom gave me a large tote bag, with sunflowers on both sides.

Spring 1995. This is a photo of the photo.

It was a perfect gift then, but I’m pretty sure neither one of us imagined I would still be using that bag today, thirty years later.

Why do I like sunflowers? Or should I say, why do I like sunflowers more than other flowers? Several reasons:

In my eyes, they’re bright and happy flowers. Cheerful. 

As flowers go, they’re pretty low maintenance — no thorns or excessive leaves to remove before snipping off the bottom of the stem and putting them into a vase full of water. 

I always felt good about selling sunflowers because they’re long-lasting, unlike other flowers, like irises for example, which only last a day or two, maybe three if you’re lucky. 

Yet, the older I get, and the more my body changes, the more it makes sense that I would find myself identifying with sunflowers. As in, maybe I liked sunflowers for more superficial reasons, and now I regard them as a sort of symbol of my life. 

I like to think I share some of the characteristics that make sunflowers the special flowers they are. 

Sunflowers, with their bright yellow color, are said to symbolize positivity and optimism. Generally speaking I try to go through life looking for the good. Hoping for the good. Spreading good by complimenting a stranger’s pretty pink nail polish. Sweeping my neighbor’s back patio. Picking up the package of cookies that fell off the shelf at the market (even though some days it really hurts to bend and pick anything up).   

Sunflowers are resilient. They are known for their ability to turn towards the sunlight and to thrive in what many would consider to be impossible-to-thrive conditions. And let’s just say that becoming chronically ill at age 34 left me no choice but to develop my resilience and create this whole other career and identity for myself as a writer. 

Sunflowers are hardy. Tough. Because when you live with chronic pain you don’t have a choice. You have to be strong.  

Some of the sunflowers in my writing room.

And, sunflowers are also a symbol for the chronic illness community. 

“The Hidden Disabilities Sunflower is a simple tool for you to voluntarily share that you have a disability or condition that may not be immediately apparent – and that you may need a helping hand, understanding, or more time in shops, at work, on transport, or in public spaces.”

That’s why you’ll find sunflowers on my website (in the header).

And when I dream of my book and the cover for my memoir-in-essays, I imagine sunflowers on it in some way. 

Dear Readers, that’s the story behind my favorite flower. May I ask, what’s your favorite flower? And, is there a particular reason why you chose that flower? Feel free to share in the comments. Let’s create a virtual bouquet of all our favorite flowers!

More sunflowers in my writing room.

A Book and Its Cover

“Don’t judge a book by its cover.”

We’ve all heard that bit of advice. (And if you’re interested, when I Googled it, I learned the origin of this expression is credited to a longer statement that conveyed the same meaning in George Eliot’s The Mill on the Floss.)

Nowadays, the adage is used broadly and is applied to many things beyond books. For instance, you can’t know a person’s true heart or friendliness by simply looking at them. You don’t always know if you’ll enjoy a meal simply based on how it looks on the plate. 

While I absolutely agree that you can never know someone’s full story or what they’re going through simply based on appearances (including my own invisible disability), when it comes to books, I think you absolutely can, and should, judge a book by its cover. 

When I scroll through books offered in a Goodreads Giveaway, I have limited information available to me. I have the title, a small photo of the book’s cover, and the first few lines of a short summary of each book. And I absolutely look at that cover image first. 

A book’s cover is an advertisement and a promise for what is included within the pages of that book. 

A dark cover featuring a sharp knife? I’ll skip that one, thank you. 

A pink cover with a woman and man facing each other? I’ll stop my scrolling to read the blurb. 

A green cover with holiday decorations? I’ll read that blurb also.

A black and gray cover with a set of eyes peering back at me? That’s one to skip.

While I’m not at that stage yet, I do sometimes think ahead and try to envision the cover of my memoir. I picture lavender or some other shade of purple. I think of sunflowers, my favorite flower, and a symbol for the chronic illness community — something I didn’t know until fairly recently. 

“The Hidden Disabilities Sunflower is a simple tool for you to voluntarily share that you have a disability or condition that may not be immediately apparent – and that you may need a helping hand, understanding, or more time in shops, at work, on transport, or in public spaces.”

I’m curious, readers. How do you decide which book to pick up at the bookstore? To check out at the library? To enter a giveaway for? Does a book’s cover play a part in influencing your decision at all? Let me know in the comments.

And, if you have any thoughts regarding my own future book cover, feel free to leave those in the comments section, too.