Month: November 2018

Mommy a.k.a. Short-Order Cook

Posted on by Wendy Kennar

What does family dinner look like in your home?

Do you sit at a table or in front of the television?  Do you all eat the same meal?

My idea of a successful family dinner has changed since becoming a parent.  And it’s my son who has taught me that what is on each of our plates isn’t nearly as important as what is happening at the table during our family dinner time.

Click here to be re-directed to parents.com to read my personal essay, “Choosing Peace over Peas.”  My essay was written in response to a Parents-sponsored essay contest, with a 300-word limit on the theme, “”The Parent I Thought I’d Be.”  I was a finalist and won a $100 gift card!

 

The 5 Hardest Things I’m Learning To Say

Posted on by Wendy Kennar

I recently completed reading Kelly Corrigan’s memoir, Tell Me More – Stories About the 12 Hardest Things I’m Learning to Say.  The book has an interesting structure; the author uses 12 different phrases as springboards for her personal stories. 

Among Ms. Corrigan’s “12 Hardest Things” are the phrases “I Don’t Know,” “I Was Wrong,” and “Tell Me More.”

It got me thinking, and inspired by the book, I’ve come up with a list of the 5 Hardest Things I’m Learning to Say.

1.  I Need Help.  Not an easy one for me, at all.  I’m used to being in charge, used to being independent, used to being able to handle everything and anything that comes my way.

2.  I Can’t Right Now.  It’s not easy for me to back out of plans or to tell my son I don’t have the energy for a bike ride.

3.  I Need to Rest.  In my head, resting (and it’s extreme – napping) means there’s really something wrong with me.  Anytime I nap, I am sick.  Really sick.  Throwing up, feverish sick.  I am like the Energizer Bunny: I just keep going.

4.  I’m Scared.  I do try to keep it all together, keep my fears in check, not let my emotions blur my logic.  But it’s hard.  Each year seems to bring with it more tests (many of which I’ve never heard of before until it’s time for me to schedule one).  And each time, I’m afraid of what the test will reveal.

5.  No.  A plain and simple reply to a multitude of requests that I don’t want to do, or don’t feel like doing, but do anyway.  

 

And you, dear readers?  What are you learning to say?  Feel free to share in the comments.

Under Self-Attack

Posted on by Wendy Kennar

 

Time spent by the ocean is always good for my soul.

I have a question for you, dear readers.  How would you define “self-care?”  

For some, it means a bit of pampering, such as taking the time to get a pedicure or massage.  For others, it means doing something just for you, something that makes you feel good, whether it’s sitting down with a cup of hot chocolate and a good book or going for a walk.

But what about people like me?  People who struggle with invisible disabilities?  People for whom “self care” means something entirely different?

Click here to be redirected to The Mighty to read my recently published personal essay, “With Autoimmune Disease, There Are More ‘Self-’ Practices Than Just Self-Care.” 

 

 

Bartering for Health

Posted on by Wendy Kennar
Does it all come down to luck? My dad and my son breaking the wishbone. Thanksgiving 2017

 

We’ve had some scary health incidents in my family during the last couple of years.  During those times, I find myself praying, thinking good thoughts, looking for signs – even more than I usually do. 

And then I take it to the next level.  I start making “deals.”  I try “bartering for health.”

“It’s a crazy kind of deal that implies I’ve got some sort of power and control, and that this higher power is just waiting, listening, and receptive to requests for such health-related barters.”

The paragraph above is taken from my personal essay, “Bartering for Health” which was published in the Fall issue of Breath and Shadow.  You can click here to read the rest of my essay.