Uncategorized

1000 Words

Posted on by Wendy Kennar

I have a shelf full of writing craft books. 

The newest one to add to my collection is 1000 Words: A Writer’s Guide to Staying Creative, Focused, and Productive All Year Round by Jami Attenberg. 

1000 Words is a collection of short pieces, including “wisdom and inspiration from more than fifty beloved writers.” 

The title of the book comes from Ms. Attenberg’s annual summer event in which writers commit to writing 1000 words a day for two consecutive weeks. There is a whole online community that not only participates but also encourages and supports each other. 

Generally, I do not write 1000 words a day. (That’s about 4 typed, double-spaced pages.)  

Once in a blue moon, the words flow and my body cooperates long enough for me to write four pages in one sitting.

But not usually.

And certainly not this summer, with my world no longer as I knew it since my dad passed away.

Still, writing inspiration never hurts. Especially now when I haven’t written much more than these weekly blog posts and my columns for MomsLA.com . 

Here then are some of the passages that resonated with me:

“Four Truths: 1) We can’t finish what we don’t start.
2) The only way to the end is through.
3) It’s important to celebrate our accomplishments.
4) We must forgive ourselves for that which we have simply not done yet.”

“Your creative self is composed of your brain, your heart, and your time. To protect your creativity, you must tend to them all.”

“Respecting your creativity is respecting yourself.”

“So write the thing that you want to see in the world. You’re the only one who can.” 

“There is only one you, your voice is singular, and if you do not write these 1000 words no one will ever know what you have to say. You absolutely must have faith in yourself, that what you need to talk about is important, and that a reader will care about it.” 

“Above all, do not feel intimidated or discouraged. You have written before, and you will write again. You write because you love it and because it’s important to you and because you have something to say.” 

“Write what you can, when you can.
“Write when the urge strikes you, but also, be disciplined. Carve out time in your day to write. Fight for that time for yourself. You can find holes in your schedule. They exist. And soon enough you will fill them with words.” 

“… making art of any kind is an act of optimism. To make art is to traffic in beliefs. The belief that you have something to say, that it’s important to say it. And also the belief that someone specific might want to witness it in some way and gain something from it.”

“Whatever it is you’re working on, whatever it is you’re dreaming about, whatever path you’re trying to carve out for yourself, whatever electricity you’re trying to generate, whatever voice you’re trying to draw out of yourself, whatever way you’re trying to connect with people, whatever you’re trying to communicate with the world, whatever fire you are trying to start this morning today this week forever and ever, you can fucking do it.” 

Friends, have you read 1000 Words and/or have you participated in the 1000 Words Summer Challenge? I’d love to know.

Please note: I am including a link to buy the book that I’m highlighting this week. If you use my link, I do make a small commission on your purchase at no additional cost to you. I am working with Bookshop.org which also sends a portion of the profit to support local, independent bookstores.

On a Scale Of …

Posted on by Wendy Kennar
Image Credit: Streetlight Magazine

Back in May, I had shared the good news that my personal essay, “On a Scale Of…” had won first place in the 2026 Streetlight Essay/Memoir Contest. (In case you missed it, you can read that blog post here.)

This week, friends, I’m pleased to share Streetlight’s 2026 Summer Issue is now available online. And, included in the Summer Issue is my award-winning essay. 

Here’s an excerpt:

“I do not like that pain scale. I like it even less than I liked the 4, 3, 2, 1 grading scale.
“I think most people living with chronic pain feel the same way I do and regard that chart as an incomplete and inaccurate way to describe pain. That scale does not take into account the pain tolerance many chronic illness patients naturally develop over time. I have lived with regular pain for over a decade. I’m certain that to an extent I have grown numb to some minor pains, and I have grown more tolerant of other pains. I have to, if I’m going to get out of bed and do anything during the day.”

You can click here to read my essay in its entirety. 

Spoonie Friends, I’m curious. How do you handle the pain scale when you’re at one of your doctor’s appointments? Let me know in the comments. 

The Non-Rules for Writing When You Live with a Chronic Illness

Posted on by Wendy Kennar
A screenshot of my published essay on The Brevity Blog

“So what happens when you’re chronically ill and you can’t sit upright at a desk? Or you can’t always write at the same time every day? What happens when one day you can’t remember the name of the tool people use for eating and twirling spaghetti though you remember the scene in Disney’s Little Mermaid when Ariel used it to brush her hair?
“What happens is we make our own ‘rules.’ (And maybe we don’t call them rules. How about — Suggestions? Techniques? Process? Routine?) We expand the definition of writing.”

The paragraphs above are an excerpt taken from my essay, “The Non-Rules for Writing When You Live with a Chronic Illness.” I’m pleased to share my essay has been published on The Brevity Blog. The essay has resonated with readers — you’ll see several comments on the post itself. I have also received DMs and an email from readers. And really, that’s all I could ever hope for — that something I wrote touched a reader and made a reader feel seen. (You can click here to read my essay in its entirety.) 

One more thing:

Thank you, my dear friends. After last week’s post about the passing of my dad (you can read it here), so many of you reached out with comments, emails, DMs, and texts. Several of my close friends sent cards in the mail. Your kind words brought tears to my eyes and truly touched me. 

Thank you, thank you, thank you for your support. Thank you for holding my family in your hearts. Thank you for being here with me. I am truly grateful.

In Loving Memory of My Dad

Posted on by Wendy Kennar
One of my favorite photos of my dad.
Look at the smile on his face as he held our son the night he was born.

My world has grown dimmer and less funny. 

My dad passed away last week, on Friday, June 26th.

Throughout his hospital stay, my dad continued being himself. When asked by a doctor how he was feeling, my dad — who was hooked up to all sorts of monitors and had IVs in his arms — said, “I’ve been better.”

Another time he complained about his lunch not being what he ordered. “I asked for tuna on white. This is wheat.” 

Days later, he would receive a tuna sandwich on white bread, eating only half of it. On another day, I held the small cola can while my dad took baby sips from the straw, and we joked that finally he was allowed to have soda on a daily basis. And at another lunchtime, I fed him diced peaches. 

A friend of mine has told me my dad was such a brave man. He was very clear on what he wanted and what he didn’t. He wanted to die with dignity, on his terms, and we did everything we could to make sure that happened. 

This blog post has taken me quite a while to write. I keep crying, thinking of my dad in that hospital bed. Thinking of the empty recliner in my parents’ home. Thinking I will never again buy him a Father’s Day card. (This year he opened his Father’s Day card in the hospital.)

My dad had a hard start to life. Things could have gone really differently for him. 

Instead he met my mom, and it’s a story he loved to tell:
“Do you know what the first word your mother ever said to me was? She told me ‘no.’”

They had me, and on their first wedding anniversary, they brought me home from the hospital.
“That year, I got out of taking your mom out to dinner,” he joked each year on their wedding anniversary.

The passing of my dad has left our family with a list of No’s. 

No more dirty jokes. (Here’s one he loved telling: “Want to hear a dirty joke? A white horse fell in the mud.”)

No more mischievousness. (When our son was a little guy, my dad loved teaching him “poems,” including “Beans beans the magical fruit, the more you eat the more you toot…”)

No more out-of-the-blue hearts texted to my phone.

No more hearing my dad say, “Hey Suri” instead of “Hey Siri.”

Ten years ago, to celebrate my dad’s 70th birthday, I wrote him a special blog post — “10 Reasons Why I Love My Daddy.” You can click here to read that post, and see some family photos. 

A Brief Update

Posted on by Wendy Kennar

From Jami Attenberg’s 1000 Words:

“… there will always be one life event or another that can distract you. Be prepared for this. I don’t live in fear of this but merely accept it as the truth. No one lives an entire life without a crisis at some point or another. And this may distract you from your daily practice.”

I am not yet ready to share about my crisis.

But for the time being, there will be no blog posts, Substack posts, or Instagram posts.

Thank you for understanding, friends.

So She Did

Posted on by Wendy Kennar

I love children’s books. 

I love discovering a children’s book that I know would have been a part of my kindergarten classroom library or would have found a spot on my son’s bookcase. 

So She Did by Dr. Aleen Kojayan is one such book. 

From the back cover:

“Jade doesn’t enjoy dance, basketball, singing or drawing; what she really loves is anything and everything to do with cars.”

Jade’s parents are mechanics who own their mechanic shop. Jade spends summers at her parents’ shop, and observes both mom and dad actively working on cars. (In fact, the book’s illustrations show Mom changing a car’s tire.) 

However, Jade’s love of cars is tested when she shares with her first-grade class her dream to grow up to become a mechanic. “‘That’s not a job for girls!’ they say.”

After being teased at school, Jade throws away all her toy cars and tells her dad, “I threw them away because girls are not supposed to play with cars.”

Jade’s dad replies: “The cars cannot see if you are a boy or a girl. They can feel your passion and your love as you work on them. You can do anything you set your mind to, including working on cars. Being a girl should not stop you, just look at your mom.”

So She Did is a sweet book, perfect for a young reader. Moreover, this is a book that can start conversations and serve as a way to broaden views about outdated, stereotypical gender roles. After all, representation matters. Children absolutely need to see themselves (including their future selves) depicted on the page (and on the screen).

Please note: I do know the author, Dr. Aleen Kojayan. In fact, Dr. K signed this copy of her book, which I will be donating to a little free library in our neighborhood. 

The Lessons We Carry With Us

Posted on by Wendy Kennar
Ryan, age 5, Pre-school Graduation

I graduated high school in June 1994. And on that June day, I sat on stage for the duration of the ceremony as one of the speakers representing our graduating class. 

My speech was titled, “The Lessons We Carry With Us.”

I don’t remember everything I spoke about, and I haven’t been able to find a copy of my speech. But I think I probably spoke about traits and skills we practiced in high school. Traits and skills that would serve us well throughout our lives; traits such as patience, perseverance, and resilience. 

Today, June 10th, 2026, our son graduates from high school.

It’s a day of reflection and for feeling all the feelings. A chance to look back and acknowledge our son’s evolution during his high school years. He started high school as a teenager. He’s finishing high school as an adult.

And today, amidst the celebration and the smiles and the tears, I’m thinking about the lessons our son has learned throughout his four years of high school.

These are the lessons I hope our son always carries with him:

1. Trust yourself. Teachers encouraged you to take additional Advanced Placement courses, but you knew what you needed. You knew what you could handle. You knew the type of high school experience you wanted. (Two AP classes were enough for you.) Continue to pay attention to that inner voice that is so strong.

2. Stay open. We’ve seen you say yes to new experiences, new foods, new clubs, new ways of doing things. Maintain that curious spirit. Continue to be willing to venture out of your comfort zone.

3. Don’t wait for others. Some of your most monumental high school experiences, you did without your closest friends at your side. You went ahead and signed up for the field trips and the spring break trip because you really wanted to go on them. And you weren’t going to sit them out just because your best friends didn’t want to go.

4. Passion matters. Think about the classes you enjoyed the most. The classes you truly cared about and worked the hardest. Those were the classes you felt passionately about. Sometimes you have to go through the motions. But whenever possible, follow your passion.

5. Celebrate your own sense of style. It has been a joy to sit back and see you develop your own sense of style. A baseball cap. A scarf. Bracelets. A necklace. Whatever you wore, you felt confident in your own skin. Confidence, and the conviction not to want to look like everyone else, never goes out of style. 

Ryan, not quite a year old, and me

Congratulations, Ryan!! We are so very proud of you!!!

Coming to a Bookstore Near You

Posted on by Wendy Kennar
My husband took this picture as I finished signing my contract.

Friends, I have news.

Big news. 

Glorious news. 

Shout-it-from-the-rooftop kind of news.

In early 2028, I will become a published author! 

My memoir-in-essays has found a home with She Writes Press! 

Let me back up a bit:

I started writing my memoir without realizing I was writing a memoir. In fact, it was my wonderful therapist who pointed out to me that all my published essays could really be the basis of a book. 

In 2021, I started working with a book coach, and with her invaluable help and guidance my collection of individual essays became a more cohesive manuscript.

In the following years, my manuscript wasn’t always my number one priority. For a while, it took a back seat to everything else I was doing and spending my energy on.

But that’s the past.

Now, I’m a member of the She Writes Press community. Because She Writes Press is more than a publishing house; it is a community of supportive female writers. In fact, I know a few authors who have published their memoirs with SWP, and before signing my contract, I spoke with them, asking them about their publishing experience. They generously answered all my questions, and only had good things to say. They spoke very highly of the entire experience — from their cover design, to their book launch events, to holding their books in their hands for the first time. And, they spoke to me about the community they had joined — the community of She Writes Press authors. 

Writing can be a lonely endeavor. Sending my book baby out into the world definitely won’t be. 

If you’re not familiar with She Writes Press, allow me to share this description (provided by SWP):

“She Writes Press is an award-winning hybrid publishing company that’s both mission-driven and community-oriented. Led by Publisher Brooke Warner, She Writes Press has published 1,200 books to date, with a specific goal to elevate women’s voices and level the playing field for indie authors. In 2016, She Writes Press won the Book Industry Study Group’s Innovator Award, and in 2019, the press was named Indie Publisher of the Year by the Independent Book Publishing Professionals Group. She Writes Press is a multi-award-winning publisher whose books have won over 2,000 awards. The press’s commitment to excellence has made it the gold standard in hybrid publishing since its founding in 2012.”

Plus, I encourage you to check out their website; you may find your next read there!

Meanwhile, thank you thank you thank you for being with me on this journey. This part of the ride is just beginning!

Romantic Comedy

Posted on by Wendy Kennar

Let me begin this week’s blog post with an excerpt: 

“With her trademark ability to bring complex women to life, Curtis Sittenfeld explores the neurosis-inducing and heart-fluttering wonder of love, while slyly dissecting the social rituals of romance in the modern age.”

The paragraph above comes from the back cover of Curtis Sittenfeld’s Romantic Comedy, a book that became a Reese’s Book Club pick back in April 2023.

I have just finished reading, and really enjoying, this smart, fun, touching novel. The first part of the book gives readers a behind-the-scenes look at “The Night Owls, a late-night live comedy show that airs every Saturday.” That section was fun because I kept thinking about Saturday Night Live while reading. 

But it’s the rest of the book — including the honest, friendly, thoughtful emails written by Sally Milz and Noah Brewster that make up Chapter 2 — that had me turning pages. I couldn’t wait to find out how things would play out with Sally and Noah. 

I highly recommend Romantic Comedy. There are so many passages that caused me to pause and reflect. So many passages I thought were just so well-written. So many passages that expressed a human sentiment so spot-on. Here are a few of my favorites:

“Or maybe the real worst-case scenario was that they’d know me in a way I didn’t want to be known by them. Even I wasn’t sure if my in-person self (a mild-mannered woman of average intelligence and attractiveness) or my scripts (willfully raging sketches about sexism and bodily functions) reflected my real self — or if I had a real self, or if anyone did.”

“I often thought that TNO was like a sped-up version of life itself, and that whether something proceeded magnificently or disastrously, time always kept rushing by and the next moment was happening.”

“… a math teacher once said at assembly that the point of life is to find the thing you’re good at and enjoy doing, and to do it for other people.” 

“Btw the other secret to becoming a TNO writer, besides getting your own TV in fifth grade, is being obsessed with Mad Libs. Did you like Mad Libs? In fourth grade, my friends and I were doing them on the bus ride back from a field trip to a nature center and, to this day, nothing has ever made me laugh more than the sentence “I was so happy that I couldn’t wipe the smile off my penis.”  (Side note — I regularly used Mad Libs in my fourth and fifth grade classes. Though, the rule was all words had to be appropriate for school. So we never had a sentence that included the word, penis.)

“Aren’t we all just looking for someone to talk about everything with? Someone worth the effort of telling our stories and opinions to, whose stories and opinions we actually want to hear?”

“Even now, I don’t have the words to express how shocked and thrilled and overwhelmed and disbelieving I was. It was like swimming in the ocean and feeling something shift under you and the next thing you know, a gigantic magical sea creature that you never knew existed is rising out of the water with you on its back.”

“This is all a (very very) long way of saying that after being married to a guy who didn’t like what made me me, and then being friends with a guy who adored me but didn’t want to make out with me, I don’t trust my own instincts. Both those situations scrambled my brain, and I know it’s a small sample size, but I decided to be done with that shit. And now our emails are scrambling me again.”

“Wasn’t this more than I’d ever imagined I could wish for, that a kind, thoughtful, smoking-hot man would think I was terrifyingly, awesomely perceptive? That he understood how neurotic I was, and didn’t seem to mind? That he saw neediness not as annoying but as normal? Hadn’t it all seemed so unlikely that I’d genuinely made peace with never finding someone like Noah except perhaps in the pages of a screenplay I wrote?”

“But human beings aren’t static images. We’re dynamic and kinetic, and it’s like I said before — right away, I wanted to talk to you, and every time I’ve talked to you since I’ve always wanted to keep talking to you.”

“I wordlessly turned my face into his chest and closed my eyes. Through my mask, his neck smelled the way he smelled on waking, some combination of being outside in the woods and bread, and I thought how in the last few weeks, the idea of him had sometimes made me nervous but the reality of him always comforted me.”

Friends, have you read Romantic Comedy? Were any of my favorite passages your favorite passages? Have you read any other novels by Curtis Sittenfeld?

Please note: I am including a link to buy the book that I’m highlighting this week. If you use my link, I do make a small commission on your purchase at no additional cost to you. I am working with Bookshop.org which also sends a portion of the profit to support local, independent bookstores.

Courage & Craft

Posted on by Wendy Kennar

A month ago, I wrote about one of the bracelets I had recently purchased from the Little Words Project. (If you missed that post, “Strong AF,” you can read it by clicking here.)

Strong AF was only one of the bracelets I had ordered for myself. 

I also bought another bracelet at the time. A custom design. The bracelet reads, “Courage&Craft.”

Courage and Craft is the title of a writing craft book written by the late Barbara Abercrombie. 

I bought the book when it was released in 2007. I was pregnant with my son when my husband and I went to the book launch event at the now-closed Dutton’s Brentwood Books. 

In the book’s introduction, Barbara wrote:

“Writing is about discovering who you really are, where you’ve been, and where you’re headed. It’s about turning the messy, crazy, wonderful, and sad stuff in your life into something that has order and clarity and meaning — a piece of writing that other people can connect to and be moved by.”

Writing, specifically writing well, requires craft. Understanding how to put words down on a page. How to craft sentences from those words, paragraphs from those sentences, pages from those paragraphs.

And more than that, writing — specifically, writing authentically — requires courage.

Barbara wrote:

“It takes courage to write down what you think and feel. But if you don’t figure out a way to get past the fear and write the truth, what are you ever going to write about? Even if camouflaged by fiction, you’ll be writing some truth of your own reality.”

It is this definition of courage that I keep in my heart:

“Courage doesn’t mean sudden, miraculous strength of character; it means doing something difficult despite the fear.”  

For me, that definition does not only apply to writing, but to life as well. 

My bracelet is a way of honoring Barbara. 

It’s also a way of honoring myself — the hard work I do on a regular basis. The work of taking twenty-six letters (that’s it, just twenty-six letters!) and re-arranging those letters in such a way that an idea that first lived in my heart and my mind can be brought to the page and shared with others. 

Friends, do you have a phrase that helps you stay motivated? A phrase that represents your creative life? I’d love to know!

Please note: I am including a link to buy the book that I’m highlighting this week. If you use my link, I do make a small commission on your purchase at no additional cost to you. I am working with Bookshop.org which also sends a portion of the profit to support local, independent bookstores.