Going On

Brave Enough book (photo by Wendy Kennar)

A very good friend gave me a copy of Cheryl Strayed’s book Brave Enough.  It’s a collection of quotes, and each day, I read a different one.  I’m a bit more than twenty pages through, and have tagged a few quotes with Post-It notes.  Here’s one I’d like to share:

“You go on by doing the best you can.  You go on by being generous.  You go on by being true.  You go on by offering comfort to others who can’t go on.  You go on by allowing the unbearable days to pass and by allowing the pleasure in other days.  You go on by finding a channel for your love and another for your rage.”

That quote seems to speak for many of my days.  I go on, simply trying to do the best I can.  I try to be a good person, showing kindness and respect to others, modeling behavior I hope my eight-year-old son will emulate.  And, I go on knowing that some days, or even parts of days, will feel unbearable and will lack much pleasure. 

My family feels my love, sees my love, hears my love.  My rage though is quiet — sobs in the shower or while I’m alone in the kitchen.  Rage won’t change my situation.  Rage won’t make the pain go away. 

But love will keep me going, slowly putting one foot in front of the other.

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